To Son, with Love

It's a momentous day for me; my son has completed his post grad and is now making the leap into the real world of holding a job and independent living. There is a lot of happiness in my heart for him, for the fact that he has been able to accomplish his goals and achieve what he had wished for.

Five years back he had left home a typical teenager, not very verbose, given to moody silences, he has transitioned from a lad into a fine young adult. Not only has he grown into an affectionate son but also a caring elder brother. One, who loves to discuss politics and the state of the economy with his dad, with his sister his conversations are more on the lines of discussing stuff they wouldn't like us to know and with his mother, he has become more patient; he may not be in agreement with me but would not like to disregard my views. Realizes that for some things this mom is a no nonsense mother and would tick him off if the need arose ... even though she may love him and give in to most of what he may want.

As a mother any change in his life for me is always fraught with slight anxiety, though on hindsight one realizes that children adapt very well to new situations but I guess being concerned for your kids becomes second nature to any mom. 

Today as he steps into this new world, what I hope is that he is able to maintain his equanimity and in learning life's lessons he keeps his innate goodness intact.

I feel proud to be his mother not for what he has achieved, but for his being such a good human being and hope that he stays the way he is, uncomplicated and grounded.

Rudyard Kipling's poem 'If' moves me a lot and any thoughts of my son always bring me to it, as Kipling's words mirror my sentiments -

IF you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!'

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings - nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!

In today's times these lines might appear a tall order to uphold and too idealistic but as a parent we would always wish for our children to choose the right path.